Navigating a Crossroads Moment: The Silent Crisis of High Achiever Burnout

Throughout our Rising Resilient series, we’ve explored resilience through many lenses – from corporate leadership to entrepreneurial grit, from communication strategies to team dynamics. And to wrap up, I’ll be doing a final closing episode pulling on the many threads that have emerged from my conversations with our guests.

But for today, I want to take us on a more intimate journey, and examine something specific, and that is what happens when high achievers reach that pivotal moment of recognising that something essential is missing, despite all their success – what I call a “Crossroads Moment”.

 

As we close out our Rising Resilient series, today, I want to take you on a journey – one that many of us will walk at some point in our lives. It’s not the kind of journey that begins with a dramatic life event. Instead, it often starts quietly. Subtly.

It’s 9:47 PM on a Sunday. Maria sits at her kitchen island, scrolling through tomorrow’s calendar while nursing a cup of chamomile tea that’s gone cold. Her laptop casts a blue glow across stainless steel appliances that rarely see use. From the outside, everything looks perfect: Senior VP position at 35, corner office, team of twenty. Yet as she closes her calendar – packed with back-to-back meetings – that familiar hollow feeling creeps in. She can’t shake the question that’s been haunting her lately: “Is this all there is?”

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This episode is about what happens when we reach that crossroads – when we find ourselves questioning the life we’ve built or the work we’ve done or the business we’ve been building. It’s about resilience, yes, but not in the way you might think. I want to focus on the situation where, in the still moments, when the world quiets down, a small voice inside us asks what’s missing.

A crucial element in the journey of rising resilient is approaching change with self-compassion. Rather than viewing setbacks as failures, they become data points helping us understand what works and what doesn’t. This perspective allows for experimentation and adjustment without judgment.

Because true resilience isn’t just about bouncing back. It’s about bouncing forward. It’s about taking the lessons, the hardships, and even the successes, and using them to grow into a new version of ourselves – one that’s more aligned, more energised, and more fulfilled.

What I’ve learned from my own journey and those of countless clients is that rising resilient isn’t a destination – it’s a continuous dance of attention and adaptation. It’s about building the capacity to notice when we’re off course and the tools to guide ourselves back.

So, if you’ve been feeling stuck, restless, or uncertain about what’s next, stay with me. We’re about to explore how to find your way forward. Let’s dive in.

The Quiet Calling

Let’s start by grounding ourselves in an all-too-familiar moment. For Sarah, an executive director in a fast-paced tech company, the moment came right after her biggest professional triumph. She had just led her team to launch a multi-million-dollar product. Her colleagues celebrated her leadership, her team admired her vision, and her industry recognised her innovation.

But Sarah felt empty. “I thought this would be my moment,” she told me. “But instead, it just feels… hollow.”

This wasn’t burnout in the traditional sense. She wasn’t crashing; she was functioning. But something essential was missing. This wasn’t a one-time feeling. It was the culmination of years of climbing the corporate ladder, chasing goals that didn’t reflect her deeper values. Her journey had been about doing what others expected – meeting deadlines, exceeding KPIs, and earning praise. And while those achievements brought short-term satisfaction, they didn’t fill the void.

Have you ever felt that way? Like you’ve worked so hard to reach a peak, only to realise that the view isn’t what you hoped?

Sarah was experiencing a disconnect between the external markers of success and her internal sense of fulfilment – the quiet realisation that the strategies that brought you here aren’t the ones that will take you forward.

These moments are pivotal. They often mark the beginning of a deeper journey – one that calls for reflection, recalibration, and realignment with what truly matters. Christina Becker talked about soul making in her interview (episode 114).

I’d venture to say that this can also come down to depletion, something high achievers often hit – and we’ll get into that and how to break through to a different approach a little bit later.

Recognising a Crossroads Moment

The feeling Sarah described – that hollow ache – is what I call a “Crossroads Moment”.

Crossroads moments can feel unsettling, but they’re actually invitations to pause and reflect. They are life’s way of saying: it’s time to recalibrate. These moments prompt us to re-evaluate where we’re headed and whether the path we’re on still aligns with who we are becoming.

But the challenge is that most of us don’t see them as invitations. Instead, we try to push through. We double down on what worked before – longer hours, stricter routines, more discipline.

And while those strategies might give us short-term results, they don’t solve the deeper issue: misalignment.

For Sarah, the first instinct was to double down on what had always worked for her. She added more projects to her plate, pursued new goals, and implemented another round of productivity hacks. But none of it eased the disconnection she felt.

Another client, Tom, experienced a similar crossroads moment. Tom ran a thriving consulting firm and had just wrapped up his most profitable year yet. But when we sat down to talk, he said, “I’ve done everything I’m supposed to. My systems are airtight, my team is incredible. But I feel like I’m barely holding it all together.”

Tom’s instinct – like Sarah’s – was to fix his disconnection by optimising further. He extended his work hours, implemented new workflows, and added more tools to his routine. But instead of resolving the issue, these actions deepened his exhaustion.

Tom wasn’t tired because his systems were broken; he was tired because he was running on autopilot. He had built a business that no longer reflected who he was or what he wanted. He was working harder not smarter!

This is the hidden cost of pushing through. When we ignore the signs that it’s time to pause and recalibrate, we risk draining our energy further, losing our joy, and missing out on the opportunity to realign.

And the more we push, the further we drift from alignment. Recognising the crossroads for what it is – a signal, not a failure – is the first step toward building true resilience.

The Hidden Cost of Pushing Through

Let’s dive deeper into why pushing through doesn’t typically work.

At its core, the problem lies in the mismatch between what we’re experiencing internally and the tools we’re using to address it. Emotional and spiritual challenges can’t be solved with logistical or tactical solutions.

Take Tom, again. When he came to me, looking for Leveraged Consulting solutions, his immediate goal was to find more time. “If I could just squeeze an extra hour or two out of my day,” he said, “I could fix this.”

But time wasn’t the issue. Tom wasn’t struggling because his schedule was mismanaged; he was struggling because his work wasn’t aligned with his values. He had built a business that looked perfect on the outside, but no longer reflected the life he wanted to lead.

Sarah faced a similar challenge. Her first response to the hollow feeling inside was to seek external validation. She poured herself into new projects, hoping that recognition from her peers would fill the void. But each achievement left her feeling more disconnected.

Which situation do you resonate with most? Personally, I’ve definitely had more than my share of Sarah moments, less so Tom moments.

The cost of this pushing through approach is two-fold. First, it depletes your energy. When you’re constantly not listening to your inner guide and keep pushing against the grain, every task feels harder than it should. Second, it creates a cycle of disconnection; the more you focus on external solutions, the further you drift from your personal needs.

Resilience isn’t about stubborn perseverance. It’s about recalibration. It’s about pausing long enough to understand what’s really happening and adjusting your course accordingly.

Now, I know what you might be thinking: This all sounds great, but how do I actually start?

The answer is simple, but not easy: you pause.

The Power of Pausing

Pausing is one of the most counterintuitive tools for resilience. Pausing can feel risky. In a culture that glorifies hustle, stepping back often feels like failure. In fact, now I mention it, have you noticed how being busy, and saying how rammed your schedule is, is almost a status symbol in the business world these days?

But in reality, as Chris Johnson talked about in her interview with me in episode 117, pausing is one of the most powerful things you can do when you’re at a crossroads moment.

Maya, a high-performing HR consultant, discovered the power of pausing through an unexpected source: a broken ankle. Forced to take six weeks off from surgery, she initially felt like her world was ending. But in that enforced pause, she began noticing things she’d missed: how her 12-year-old daughter’s voice had changed, the way morning light hit her garden, the simple pleasure of an unhurried cup of coffee.

When she returned to work, she maintained one simple practice: a 10-minute pause between meetings, just to breathe and reset. “That small pause,” she says, “changed everything about how I go about my day.” In episode 109, Jo Hafey talked about resetting, re-centring, and re-grounding ourselves.

Pausing feels counterintuitive because it feels like the opposite of what we should do. In a world that rewards constant productivity, pausing can feel indulgent – even irresponsible. So if it helps, think of it as a “purposeful pause.”

For Sarah, pausing meant stepping away from the daily grind for a week. She spent her mornings journaling, her afternoons walking in nature, and her evenings reflecting on what truly mattered to her. At first, she felt guilty. She told me, “It felt like I was wasting time, being lazy, like I should be doing something productive.”

But by the end of the week, something shifted. Sarah began to notice patterns in her thoughts. And she gained clarity. She realised that much of her dissatisfaction came from chasing external validation, living for others’ expectations – what her boss wanted, what her industry applauded, what her colleagues expected. She had spent years chasing goals that looked good on paper but didn’t align with her personal values.

For Tom, pausing looked different. I asked him to block out two hours every Friday afternoon as “thinking time.” No emails, no meetings, no calls. Just space to reflect on his week. He resisted at first, saying, “I don’t have time for this. There’s too much to do.”

But when he finally committed to this practice – which started with just one hour – it transformed his week. He used that time to ask himself questions like:

• What’s energising me right now?
• What’s draining me?
• What adjustments can I make next week to feel more aligned?

These pauses weren’t about avoiding tasks he didn’t like to do or “shirking” responsibility. No, they were about creating space to reconnect with the deeper goals and values. Tom found that those two hours became his most valuable time. They allowed him to step back, identify what was working and what wasn’t, and make intentional adjustments.

Purposeful pausing is about creating space. Space to reflect, recalibrate, and reconnect with what truly matters to you. And you can’t force it, you have to give the practice time and allow the shifts to happen.

I remember asking a friend who is a life coach: how long do I give it? What happens if I don’t get answers after a week or a couple of weeks. And she said, you have to give it the time it needs. For deeply embedded trauma or discontent, where you’ve pushed through and dragged yourself along for years and years, it can take a while.

My own story is that I’d all but retired because I hit a crossroads moment that was so jarring, I could hardly function. It took 18 months to really surface – then I completed a book I’d been writing and parking for years, and launched a podcast. Because when you have total clarity, you become unstoppable.

This time to pause became a sacred space for recalibration – a time to evaluate what was working, what wasn’t, and what adjustments needed to be made.

Pausing isn’t about avoiding responsibility. The power of the pause lies in its ability to create clarity to move forward with intention. It’s about stepping back to ensure you’re moving in the right direction.

 

Reflection as the Gateway to Resilience

At the heart of resilience is reflection. Reflection is the bridge between where you are and where you want to go.

What do I mean by this. Well, reflection is what allows us to turn experiences – both good and bad – into learning. It’s what helps us notice patterns, recognise what’s no longer serving us, and identify new possibilities.

Reflection isn’t just about sitting quietly and thinking deep thoughts. It’s about asking the right questions and being curious about the answers. It’s the practice that allows us to notice patterns, learn from experiences, and recalibrate our actions to align with what truly matters.

But let’s be honest – reflection isn’t always easy. In fact, it’s often uncomfortable. It requires us to sit with questions that don’t have immediate answers; it can feel like a waste of time. And it can mean confronting truths we may have been avoiding.

For Sarah, reflection meant peeling back the layers of her dissatisfaction. She began by journaling each morning, asking herself questions like:

• What am I chasing?
• What truly brings me joy?
• What would success look like if it felt good – not just looked good?

Her first instinct was to focus on external answers – better projects, bigger goals, more recognition. But over time, she realised that her dissatisfaction wasn’t about what she was doing; it was about why she was doing it. She had been living for the approval of others, rather than for her own fulfilment.

Tom’s reflection process was more structured. Each Friday, during his designated thinking time, he asked himself three questions:

1. What energised me this week?
2. What drained me?
3. What adjustments can I make next week to feel more aligned?

At first, his answers were surface-level – things like “too many meetings” or “not enough time for strategic work.” But as the weeks went on, he began to uncover deeper patterns. He realised that much of his exhaustion came from spending time on tasks he didn’t enjoy, tasks that could easily be delegated to his team.

Reflection isn’t just about noticing what’s wrong. It’s about creating a roadmap for change.

If you’re unsure where to start, here’s a simple exercise: At the end of each day, write down two things:

1. A moment that made you feel alive and engaged.
2. A moment that left you feeling drained or disconnected.

Over time, these small reflections will reveal powerful insights about what’s working in your life and what isn’t.

James had his breakthrough moment on a park bench in Central Park. A senior partner at a consulting firm, he’d escaped there during lunch after a particularly stressful morning. Watching a group of kids playing frisbee, he remembered something: at their age, he’d wanted to be a teacher. Not just any teacher – one who made science fun, who helped kids see the magic in mathematics.

Somewhere along the way, that dream had gotten buried under promotions and expectations. That afternoon, he didn’t quit his job or make any dramatic changes. Instead, he started volunteering at a local STEM program on Saturday mornings. “For the first time in years,” he says, “I remembered who I was beyond my job title.” Isn’t that amazing!

 

Breaking through the Depletion Cycle

Now let’s step back again and pick up the concept of this crossroads moment. Be aware, this can happen at any age, and any stage of your life. And it’s not necessarily triggers by a specific life event, it can be a slow burn.

Alex’s story perfectly illustrates what happens when we try to push through this feeling. As a startup founder, he noticed his energy dropping three months after a successful Series A round. His solution? Double down on what got him there. He extended his workday by two hours, added a 5 AM workout, and downloaded three more productivity apps. Six weeks later, he found himself staring at his office ceiling at midnight, unable to remember the last time he’d felt truly excited about anything. His company was growing faster than ever, but he felt like he was shrinking inside.

What makes the crossroads particularly challenging is how interconnected everything becomes. Physical exhaustion affects our emotional resilience. Emotional depletion impacts our ability to maintain healthy habits. Disrupted routines undermine our capacity to connect meaningfully with others or pursue activities that once brought joy.

Once recognised, the typical response of doubling down on what worked before is often counterproductive. Yet still we try:

– More rigorous scheduling

– Stricter self-discipline

– Additional productivity systems

– Enhanced optimisation of every aspect of life.

It’s as if we’re trying to solve an emotional and spiritual question with purely logical and practical tools. This approach often takes us further from what we’re really seeking.

As I’ve already mentioned, the journey back to vitality begins with a counterintuitive first step: pausing the constant push for improvement long enough to really listen to what our energy is telling us. This isn’t about giving up or scaling back our ambitions. Rather, it’s about reconnecting with the natural rhythms that support sustainable success, and reframing the questions.

Let’s start with that, and the vital shift happens when we start asking different questions:

1. Instead of “How can I do more?” we explore “What truly energises me?”
2. Rather than “What should I want?” we investigate “What do I actually want?”
3. Moving from “How can I push through?” to “What is this teaching me?”
4. Instead of “What’s wrong with me?” we ask “What’s trying to emerge?”

In regards to understanding natural rhythms, one of the most powerful revelations in this journey is that our energy isn’t meant to be constantly high. Just as nature moves through seasons, our vitality has its own natural ebbs and flows.

This understanding in itself can often bring immediate relief – it’s not that you’re doing something wrong when your energy dips; you’re experiencing a natural part of your human rhythm.

I dug into seasonality as an energy flow and how we’re often feeling a little low in end of summer blues – I did a whole episode on that (episode 95 or you can read as an article). It really is something you need to start to notice, and know that it’s completely natural. Instead of dreading the approach of winter, Jo Hafey (who I interviewed in episode 109) taught me to embrace it what do I love about winter that I can really lean into.

Before rushing to add new practices or habits, there’s immense value in this “purposeful pause” – a time to really feel where you are right now. This isn’t about meditation or mindfulness (though those can be valuable tools); it’s about honest acknowledgment of your current state of mind, body and soul.

During this pause, consider:

– What activities genuinely energise you versus drain you

– Where you feel most alive and engaged

– What you’re doing when time seems to flow naturally

– What you’ve been avoiding or putting off

– Where you feel most authentic versus where you’re “performing”

The path back to vitality isn’t about dramatic transformations. It’s about sustainable practices. Small, consistent shifts that align with your natural way of being.

 

Connection: The Missing Piece

There’s a final piece of the resilience puzzle that many of my Rising Resilient guests spoke about, and it’s all too often overlooked. And that’s connection.

Connection isn’t just a nice-to-have; it’s a crucial component of resilience. Because rising resilient isn’t a solo journey – and I’m not talking about work connections and meetings we have with colleagues even if they may be friends and conversations may be light or fun at times.

Connection with others is deeply personal; but it’s also deeply relational. The people we surround ourselves with – our mentors, peers, friends, and family – play a crucial role in how we navigate challenges and grow forward.

One of Sarah’s biggest breakthroughs came from joining a mastermind group. Even though it was work-related, but that connection was absolutely critical for her. For years, she had carried the weight of her professional challenges alone, believing that she had to figure everything out herself. Being part of a community of like-minded leaders gave her a new perspective. She realised that she wasn’t alone in her struggles – and that there was power in sharing her journey with others.

Tom found connection in a different way. He began having weekly one-on-one check-ins with his team, not just about work tasks but about how they were feeling and what they needed to thrive. These conversations strengthened relationships, built trust, and brought new energy to his business.

Connection doesn’t have to be formal or structured. It can be as simple as reaching out to a friend, sharing your struggles with a partner, or joining a community that aligns with your goals.

The key is to remember that you don’t have to navigate life’s challenges and crossroad moments alone.

Who’s in your corner? And how can you lean on them as you navigate your own journey?

 

Redefining Success

Finally, let’s talk about success.

For so many of us, success has been defined by external markers: promotions, income, accolades. And while those markers can be meaningful, they don’t tell the whole story.

True resilience requires redefining success in a way that includes well-being, alignment, and joy.

For Michael, the wake-up call came in the form of his daughter’s birthday card. At the top, she’d drawn a picture of their family: stick figures labeled ‘Mom,’ ‘Emma,’ and ‘Dad’s Office.’ He wasn’t even in the picture – just his office. That night, after the party, he sat in his study looking at that card for hours.

The next day, he didn’t make any grand gestures or quit his CFO position. Instead, he made one small change: he started leaving the office at 5:30 PM every Wednesday for ‘Adventure Night’ with his daughter. “Success used to mean hitting our quarterly targets,” he reflects. “Now it means being in the picture.”

For Sarah, success used to mean climbing the corporate ladder as quickly as possible. But after her crossroads moment, she began to see success as something more holistic. It wasn’t just about hitting goals; it was about feeling connected to her work and her values.

For Tom, success used to mean running a flawless business. But as he reflected on his priorities, he realised that his real measure of success was the quality of his relationships – with his team, his clients, and his family.

What I’ve learned from my own journey and those of countless clients is that rising resilient isn’t a destination – it’s a practice. Remember what I said at the start, it’s about building the capacity to notice when we’re off course and the tools to guide ourselves back.

True resilience isn’t about pushing through depletion; it’s about creating sustainable patterns that support vitality. This might mean:

– Redefining success to include wellbeing

– Finding ways to honour both professional commitments and personal needs

– Creating rituals that support transition, resetting and renewal

– Building support systems that acknowledge both strength and vulnerability.

Redefining success doesn’t mean abandoning ambition. It means expanding your definition to include what truly matters.

So, let me ask you: What does success mean to you? And how might you redefine it to include both achievement and alignment?

 

The Shift from Surviving to Thriving

This brings us to the essence of resilience: the ability to bounce forward and make small, but intentional shifts.

Bouncing forward isn’t about returning to the way things were. It’s about using the lessons from your crossroads moments to create something new – something that feels more aligned, more sustainable, and more fulfilling.

For Sarah, bouncing forward meant redefining her relationship with success. She realised that she had been measuring her worth by external achievements – titles, promotions, and accolades. But those markers no longer resonated with her.

So, she began to experiment with small, intentional changes. She carved out 30 minutes each day for creative projects that had nothing to do with her job. She said no to a high-profile project that didn’t align with her values. And she began having honest conversations with her team about what truly mattered to her.

At first, these changes felt insignificant. But over time, they created a ripple effect. Sarah felt more energised, more connected, and more in tune with her work.

For Tom, bouncing forward meant restructuring his workweek. He started blocking his mornings for deep, focused work – tasks that required his full energy and creativity. Afternoons were reserved for lighter, collaborative work, like team check-ins and brainstorming sessions.

He also began delegating tasks that drained him. By empowering his team to take on more responsibility, he freed up time and energy for the parts of his business he loved most.

Bouncing forward doesn’t require a dramatic life overhaul. Resilience thrives on consistently small, intentional shifts that align your actions with your values.

For me, it was starting to lift some weights. After a recent transatlantic trip, and deep and vulnerable conversation with a client-friend, I promised myself I would at least START. The day I returned and even with jetlag still hanging over me, I picked up the box of dumbbells I’d bought with all good intentions probably 3 or more years ago, and I went through a set of lifting exercises. It took 10 minutes and felt really good – not just for the muscle workout but because I did what I said I’d do, and I did it for myself, not for anyone else. And it was not work-related!

For you, the shift might be something entirely different. Maybe it’s saying no to one commitment that doesn’t align with your needs. Maybe it’s revisiting an old passion or hobby. Maybe it’s simply giving yourself permission to rest.

 

5 Resilience Focusing Practices

As we move forward, consider these five key areas of practice I’m going to go through by way of summarising. Then pick 2-3 that you will commit to do, and just START.

 

#1. Physical Foundations

– Understanding and managing your unique energy patterns

– Creating rhythms that work with, not against, your natural cycles

– Establishing sustainable healthy habits that don’t require heroic effort

– Recognising the connection between physical wellbeing and emotional resilience

 

#2. Emotional and Spiritual Renewal

– Acknowledging the difference between readiness for change and energy for change

– Finding ways to feel more alive within existing constraints

– Reconnecting with curiosity and possibility

– Building meaningful moments into daily life

 

#3. Practical Implementation

– Daily check-ins to track energy, mood, and physical wellbeing

– Identifying patterns that enhance or deplete vitality

– Celebrating small wins and progress

– Setting intentions that align with both current reality and desired change

 

#4. The Role of Self-Compassion

A crucial element in this journey is approaching change with self-compassion. Rather than viewing setbacks as failures, they become data points helping us understand what works and what doesn’t. This perspective allows for experimentation and adjustment without judgment.

 

#5. The Community Factor

One of the most consistent patterns I’ve observed is that sustainable change rarely happens in isolation. While the journey is personal, having witnesses and supporters along the way can make all the difference. This might include:

– Professional support (coaches, mentors, therapists)

– Peer groups or mastermind communities

– Close friends who understand your journey

– Family members who can support your changes

 

Moving Forward: Your Next Steps

If you’re reading this and recognising your own story in these words, know that this moment of recognition is powerful. It’s not a sign that something’s wrong – it’s an invitation to something more aligned, more vital, and more authentic to who you are.

The journey from depletion to vitality isn’t linear, and it doesn’t require a complete life overhaul. It starts with simple acknowledgment of where you are and a willingness to explore what might bring you more alive.

By addressing both physical and spiritual aspects of wellbeing, we can begin to break the cycle of depletion and move toward a more resilient, vital way of living.

Consider starting with these simple practices:

1. Take regular energy readings throughout your day
2. Notice what activities give you energy versus drain it
3. Create small pauses between activities to reset
4. Identify one thing that makes you feel more alive and do it regularly
5. Build a support system for your journey

 

Conclusion

Remember, the goal isn’t to reach some perfect state of constant high energy and clarity. It’s to build the resilience to navigate life’s natural cycles while staying connected to what matters most to you.

As we wrap up, I want to leave you with this: resilience is about compassion, calm confidence, and having the courage to adjust when life or work feel misaligned. It’s about creating a life that feels as good on the inside as it looks on the outside.

This journey, while challenging, offers the possibility of not just surviving but truly thriving. It’s about progress, not perfection – not transformation in a single leap, but steady movement toward greater aliveness and purpose.

The path forward might not always be clear, but by staying connected to what truly energises us and working with our natural rhythms rather than against them, we can find our way back to vitality. This is what it means to truly rise resilient.

So here’s my invitation:

• Take 15 minutes today to reflect on your energy.
• Identify one small change you can make this week to feel more aligned.
• Reach out to someone who can support you on your journey.

Thank you for spending this time with me as I complete the pieces of the Rising Resilient framework. And note, I’ve changed the names in my stories to protect the innocent, but they know who they are! We all recognise ourselves in these scenarios.

Generally speaking, the Leveraged Business Podcast is about working smarter not harder, and it’s been fascinating to see an interweaving throughout the interviews of the pieces of mindset, marketing and money model breakthroughs that is the cornerstone of the show. For me, if the mind, body and soul are listened to, respected and nurtured, the marketing and money stuff is way easier to sustain!

Next time, I’ll be doing a super powered wrap up – a summary of the emerging wisdom and insights across the series. In the meantime, keep rising, keep reflecting, and keep moving forward towards your great success!

In the meantime, go grab my Resilience Pillars free resource and home in on those things that energise you most.

 

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